60 seconds in my mind

I haven’t slept in days. Why do you expect so much from me, self? The hallucination of the Leprechaun on the tree stump in the front yard wasn’t entertaining enough to write about today, so you had to sit and think about it while cooking food you’re probably not going to like but don’t really care because the stress has destroyed your stomach and, therefore, are stressing yourself out even more?

Oh, wait, that’s right.  You don’t want to write about that idea yet because you want to see if you can make money from it.  *pfft* Loser.  You’re not going to make money on that idea and all it’s going to do is get you hate mail and, quite likely, a fist to the face.  Because we’re assuming Chuck Norris won’t be offended by it and therefore you won’t get a roundhouse kick to the face.

Why did that get so popular?  Wasn’t he just a joke when you were growing up?  Isn’t the only movie you’ve ever seen him in “Sidekick”?  And the only other times you’ve seen him were in those infomercials with that model chick who really isn’t that hot.  But at least she’s better than the fat chick from yesterday wearing tights so tight her pants were see through and the seams were starting to burst.  That was just gross.  Great, now you’re not hungry anymore.  What the fuck is wrong with you for even thinking something like that while you’re trying to eat?  At least the food didn’t turn out so bad, although the garlic is a bit overpowering, but maybe a little soy sauce will fix that.  Soy sauce fixes everything.  It’s the cure for chlamydia disguised.  Okay, so the Sriacha turned out to be a better condiment for this meal.  Because hot sauce is going to help your sick tummy tremendously.  And you think in italics way too much for it to be healthy.

But thinking in bold seems like it would be too loud.  Is this loud? Yeah, it was rather disturbing, and no one wants to disturb the peace in your mind.  *snicker*


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