My Pumpkin has a Penis

The internet is telling me I have to make my pumpkin have sex with itself in order to actually get a pumpkin. Also, I think my pumpkin is a hermaphrodite. Scratch that, I KNOW it’s a hermaphrodite. In the literal sense. It has a functioning male part and a functioning female part. HA! It’s more queer than I could ever DREAM to be!

Pumpkin Flowers and Writing Books

Pumpkins, and writing, and algae! OH MY! Wait, I didn’t mention the algae…

I’m a Horrible Plant Father

I swear, your honor, I didn’t know it was poison! I just thought it was a product of Pirates or something, really!